Can I borrow some courage?

My friend Jessie is an incredible writer, a rad feminist, and a pop culture connoisseur. I look up to her for being so unabashedly, unapologetically unashamed of her fuck-ups and stumbles along the path of life. 

In her most recent post she talks about happiness and relationships. In one particularly poignant part, she muses: 

‎"But attaining happiness isn’t the same as sustaining it. And it’s not like you get happy and it just stays with you from then on out. You can lose happiness just as much as you can gain it."

I know this all too well, as I spend a large part of my life researching, practicing, and quite often failing to understand the science of happiness. And though I have had far too many glimpses of happiness to complain, I do know that the most challenging part of happiness is maintaining it. 

For us "feminists" or "independent women" or "single ladies", or whatever the hell you want to call us, as much as we rant against letting our relationships define us, we do know that our happiness is inextricably linked to our relationships with other humans, especially the romantic ones. 

In her recent post (seriously, if you haven't read her blog yet, do it and then come back mkay?), Jess took off all her protective fem-armor, and talked some real talk about relationships. This got me wondering, could I do that? 

Really, could I? 

After all, I myself have experienced some of that make-everyone-else-want-to-vomit type happiness, which, unfortunately or fortunately, was while I was in a relationship. And just as Jessie points out that happiness can be lost, I of course did lose mine. I just don't know how to talk about it without sounding bitter. It is a fine line, and being honest usually gets you called a sap, a bitter bitch, or just gets you sympathy -- none of which I want, so I guess I'll keep my mouth shut until I can borrow some of that courage from my girl Jessie. 

Ok really, go read her blog.